As women juggle household chores, parenting responsibilities, and work deadlines, they are at increasing risk of experiencing mom guilt. They find themselves overwhelmed by the emotional turmoil of feeling like they are not doing enough for their family and children. In a fast-paced work culture that has normalised the hustle, the guilt only presses on, as mothers try to balance both work and home with equal fervour, but still feel they are falling short on all fronts.

In an interview with HT Lifestyle, Dr Michelle Shah, a Paediatric Lifestyle Medicine Specialist, unpacks this silent emotional burden. The effects are far-reaching, impacting their health to career growth.

She explained mom guilt and added, “Motherhood is often portrayed as a journey filled with joy, fulfilment and boundless love. Yet, for many women, this experience is accompanied by persistent feelings of guilt, self-doubt and overwhelm, a phenomenon widely known as ‘mom guilt’. Today, a large number of working mothers find themselves walking a tightrope, expected to excel in their careers while managing the lion’s share of caregiving responsibilities. This unrelenting pressure fuels a pervasive yet often overlooked emotional burden of guilt.”

Dr Michelle Shah shared a detailed guide with us, explaining the origins of mom guilt to the health consequences:

Origin behind ‘mom guilt’

• Rooted in societal expectations that glorify maternal sacrifice, this guilt drives women to overcompensate, often at the cost of their well-being.
• Women, regardless of economic background, face cultural conditioning that equates good motherhood with selflessness. The expectation to attend every school event, prepare home-cooked meals daily and be hyper-present in their children’s lives, all while excelling professionally, creates impossible standards.
• The emotional toll is severe, leading to burnout, anxiety, and an increasing number of women stepping away from their careers despite wanting to work.

Mom guilt creates ripple effect in society

• Mom guilt has far-reaching consequences that extend into workplaces, leadership dynamics and society as a whole.
• Women grappling with this internal conflict often find themselves hesitating to pursue career growth opportunities, not out of a lack of ambition but because they’re burdened by the pressure to prioritise family above all else.
• This silent struggle significantly contributes to the ‘leaky pipeline,” where talented women opt out of leadership tracks, limiting female representation in decision-making roles.

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Consequences of ‘mom guilt’

From a health standpoint, mom guilt is not just a psychological challenge; it’s a silent contributor to chronic disease. The mental strain manifests physically, affecting long-term well-being:

1. Chronic stress: Constantly feeling ‘not enough’ keeps cortisol levels high, increasing risks of cardiovascular diseases, weakened immunity, and hormonal imbalances.
2. Sleep Deprivation: Guilt often pushes mothers to sacrifice rest, impairing cognitive function, emotional regulation, and overall health.
3. Emotional Exhaustion: Suppressing guilt and frustration over time can lead to depression, emotional detachment, and strained family relationships.
4. Neglecting Self-Care: Many mothers deprioritise exercise, nutrition and mindfulness, core pillars of lifestyle medicine, exacerbating their health struggles.

Rethinking support systems

Companies, policymakers, and communities must actively create environments where maternal well-being is prioritised. Solutions may include:

1. Flexible work policies: Encouraging adequate maternity leave, hybrid models, remote work and adaptable schedules that enable mothers to balance professional and family responsibilities.

2. Access to mental health support: Providing counselling services, mental wellness programs and emotional resilience training for parents.

3. Promoting workplace inclusion: Normalising caregiving duties among all employees, regardless of gender, to reduce the pressure on mothers alone.

4. Health-centered solutions: Encouraging mothers to embrace lifestyle medicine practices, such as balanced nutrition, physical activity, and mindfulness, as essential steps in managing stress and enhancing overall well-being.

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Note to readers: This article is for informational purposes only and not a substitute for professional medical advice. Always seek the advice of your doctor with any questions about a medical condition.